12

Twelve is probably my favorite movie ever created, not only because of the yummy Chace Crawford but the fact it was filmed in the beautiful New York City. Also, it delves into the life of the young and wild teens with a taste for drugs, sex, and rock n' roll. If you're bored or want something awesome to watch when its raining outside, pop this in and enjoy! You will not be disappointed and trust in turbulence baby.

Marry me.

1977 Warehouse Captured from a Security Guard

I have been working for Allied Barton Security Services for a little over a year now and have enjoyed the entire learning experiance thus far. In my continuing pursuit of hopefully one day joining the officers in blue, I was recently promoted and offered the new position of site supervisor for a very old, very falling apart warehouse in the town I live in. I wasn't very eager to step foot in the Saw movie look-alike warehouse I was assigned to but as a security officer and newly appointed site supervisor, I ventured inside.

The first thing that hit me was the smell and the sound. It smelled like a wet, dead something and I heard well, silence. After a few weeks passed, I was able to find my way around the old warehouse and found it to be not so scary but fascinating...

This picture is of an old safe located in the front of the building!

Outside!

The elevator!

 

Lo and behold the Saw look-alike warehouse was antique yet awesome. It doesn't have a set date to be demolished as of now but I feel lucky to have captured a little piece of my town's history.

 

"Freeze the world in time to understand..."

What happens when you think you trust someone and they prove you were just naive in all sense of the word?

I am afraid to admit, once again, that I fell into that trap. We have all been through relationships where we were hurt and felt completely broken.We've all had friends who have warned us about a person but we just don't listen. It's liketh e ones who could hurt us the worst should have to walk around with a huge sign screaming WARNING: CANNOT BE TRUSTED RUN AWAY AND NEVER LOOK BACK. Unfortunalty, if we don't ever go through this pain, we will never know how to grow.

But what happens when we don't want to see the signs, even if there was a WARNING sign hanging around their neck screaming for you to read? What happens when you are in too deep and can't sift through the love and lust feelings? Am I falling in love or getting deeper in lust? Will I be able to catch myself or dig myself out if I let this go on further? Unfortunalty, only time can tell with this one...

I met him and I couldn't stop my stomach from tightening or get my mouth to stop smiling. I kissed him and couldn't stop shaking from the excitment and electricity. I didn't tell anyone for fear he would disappear. As time went on, we grew closer. I fell harder (dug deeper?). His response was what I needed to feel ok, to make the day a little brighter.

More time passed, then I felt stuck because I needed his response and he  was slowly disappearing. My desperate, vulnerable heart lashed out, begging for some kind of life but he was gone. I was pounding on the door but no one answered. My days went on but I felt numb like I was going through someone else's cycle. I woke up and did the same thing every day, trying to stop my head from thinking. I tried falling asleep with the TV on, then off. Headphones in then out but nothing turned my mind off. I let him think I was fine then I let him think nothing at all because I realized I had disappeared. I didn't know who I was anymore because I had let the one thing touch me that I vowed never to happen again...I let down a wall, broken a promise, let someone in, became vulnerable...fallen. Meanwhile, he had found another distraction when I was falling and digging the hardest and deepest...

This all should sound familar to each of us and if it doesn't then you haven't experianced true heartbreak. It is one of the hardest things I have ever dealt with in my life because I cannot control my feelings..but I suppose I have to trust in the turbulence of life...

Trust in your Turbulence...

If someone shook me awake this morning and told me I was going to be creating a blog today, I would have told them they were crazy and rolled back over with my pillow over my head. As it turns out, whoever shook me awake was indeed, correct.

Over the past months, a close and wonderful friend of mine would send me blogs she would read everyday and finally she made one of her own. I took a look and was hooked on the idea of having somewhere I could write freely other then the notorious FaceBook, Twitter and/or the disappearing MySpace. I struggled on a display name and title as my iTunes was shuffling itself in the background and The Working Title's, "Turbulence", shuffled its way to the front sparking my blog name, title, and premise of this blog. I give all credit to the four members for the idea and inspiration from their beautiful 9 minutes and 18 seconds melody.

Another reason I took to the idea of having a place to write was to do the best thing one can do when facing a problem, vent it and try to trust in the turbulence of life.